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Discover 3 Steps To Take When You And Your Spouse Just Can't Agree
By Christopher Hall
There are some things in a marriage that you and your spouse will never agree on. It does not matter that you say, what you think, or what you do. There is just no way that you will ever agree on it. So what do you do? How do you cope? Here are 3 steps to take that will help you out. 1. Determine If It Is A Matter Of Right Or Wrong First ask yourself, “Are we arguing over something that has a definite right or wrong answer?” Most of the time the answer to this question is no. Most of the things that spouses can’t agree on are conveniences, habits, rituals, or preferences. If it is not a matter of right or wrong, then it is certainly not worth ruining a relationship over. 2. If It Is A Matter Of Right Or Wrong… If you can’t agree on a subject and it is a matter of right and wrong, then here are the steps you can take. 1) Do nothing – just understand that you will never agree and leave it at that. 2) Be a good spouse – you are dealing with an adult. You cannot force them to do what you want. You may never be able to change them, but you can change yourself. Only focus on what you can control, and that is you. Do what you believe is right in love (not anger), and let your actions speak for themselves. 3) Get counseling – sometimes an unbiased opinion is enough to sway the person in the other direction. If they hear someone else say the same thing you have been saying, it might encourage them to change. 3. If It Is Not A Matter Of Right Or Wrong… If you can’t agree on a subject and you determine that there is no 100% “right” answer, then you may need to compromise. Do it your way once and do it their way next. Come up with some solution that allows you to both peacefully agree to disagree. Sometimes you will find that after you compromise, suddenly the disagreement doesn’t seem so important. You may realize that you unintentionally became more attached to winning the argument than to doing what you wanted. |
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